During the Stand Up For Stree Campaign by Limitless Stree, campaign, we (Sangeetha and Yashda, as Limitless Stree members ) had an opportunity to interact with a person who went through workplace harassment which is the turning point in her life journey. In this blog, we would like to share her story.
Sharing it in her own words –
The story originates from workplace harassment but all aspects of my life got deeply affected as I went under 6 types of Abuse – Physical, Emotional, Retaliation, Psychological, Personal and Verbal. The story’s base is similar to other abuses. It was from a guy whom I knew, shared a deep bond with, and I was dependent on him emotionally. He ruined my professional, personal, and public life. If I see any positive outcome of this, I started my own NGO, as I always wanted to bring social and political change, participate in movements and work with people with the same interests.
It’s just not a story of harassment, it is a story of the right perspective, absolute manipulation, brutal societal discrimination, and my self-respect which I let suffer because I did not get help from many people. I am not emotionally weak but have emotional dependence due to childhood trauma and mental health issues.
I was different, and I always felt that I was among these other youngsters who were participating in protests for the overall betterment of our nation at the age of 20. I have been closely working with many NGOs with a bunch of friends. He and I were a part of many NGOs, protests, projects together, so we knew each other’s duly presence.
Because of close work on this protest, our bond became stronger. We used to do almost every activity together, and we shared a beautiful friendship. After some time, he proposed to me but I denied & demanded some space to think about the proposal. Some days later, he came to me with the news that due to my denial and confusion, he got a relationship with another girl, which changed the bond and created a gap between us, and we moved on decently and worked on our project.
Later the news of his breakup reached me. After a few days, we started to hang out again, and I felt safe when I was around him. And with time, I started liking his company. Days later, we went out again, and by this time, I accepted that I enjoyed his company, so I decided to see where this dating went further. The next few weeks described ahead are the most difficult days of my life.
He knew my emotional side was vulnerable, and he started to manipulate me to have sexual intercourse with him. The same thing repeatedly happened, which I denied, but he did not accept that and constantly tried to get what he wanted. Being a person of anxiety, the entire scenario started to hit me all at once. I was pushed to do all the things like an emotional idiot.
I went through public humiliation where the abuser made me feel shame for the wrong things he did in my life, which is ridiculous and unbearable.
One man’s transparency is another’s humiliation.
– Gerry Adams
Some of the screenshots with him he published on social media without my concern then the social media war started were my familiar friends, cousins, and siblings had seen those. Everyone started blaming me, but I was not able to explain exactly what happened to me and received many DMs with horrible messages. As part of this incident, he shamed me on social media, which made me again feel very depressed, and it reached a wider audience. These situations made me a stronger woman and taught me the best lesson in my life.
Public Humiliation and Slut Shaming happened when I reached out to ask for help publicly with a story, and my abuser also published his side of the story. The world chose him with his more creative cooked-up story where he received more support, and I was left alone because I shared the truth, whereas he shared the lie. Is this how I should have been treated?
Every bad situation will have something positive. Even the dead clock shows the correct time twice a day. Stay positive in life. God knows what is best for you.
He portrayed himself as a victim, and he showed that he is suffering from severe mental health issues. Post this. I came to know that he cheated on many women. In just two months, he got married! Whereas I got distracted by other people’s tragedy and ignored my pain. There are nights when all I think about is him and all the trauma I felt through. I will help as many victims as possible. Maybe that could bring me some peace. I will ask you all to take space, care, and do what you do with absolute perfection.
One for all, all for one.
As women, we have to be bold enough to face challenges in the world and the people around us.
The above story is just one we came across. There are “n” number of invisible stories which are hidden, and they suffer a battle within themselves. Lets us #StandUpForStree! Let’s stand against such abuse.
You may think about what women can do in receiving horrible or abusive messages in any form. If you are someone undergoing such incidents or your peers, you can help them in the following ways:
- You can contact/reach out to the following helpline numbers,
1091 – Women Helpline ( All India ) – Women In Distress
191 – Women Helpline Domestic Abuse
1098 – Student / Child Helpline
- For more details, you could visit this page:
- It would help if you did not hesitate to report these kinds of incidents to the management or global helpline, and one should combat these situations.
- You can also seek help from experts.
As per the statistic, it is known that Workplace Harassment is increasing rapidly. Limitless Stree provided us with an excellent opportunity to lead our campaign on various topics. We chose the topic Marginalized Communities & Workplace Harassment. This campaign is led by Limitless Strees’ Yashda Suthar, Dona Jancy, Harshita Baloji, Srushti Bogar, and Sangeetha Ramanathan
About The Authors
Sangeetha and Yashda are Limitless Stree Volunteers who are committed to working for gender equality.
Yashda is a student of Punjab University. She specifically wants to work to stop the sexual exploitation of men and women.
Sangeetha is based in Chennai. She works in the Software Industry. Her concern is towards the recent issues that women are facing due to the COVID situation like child marriage, domestic violence etc.